Redrawing the lines

Once you have the basic colors down, often some of the lines originally drawn become obscured. At this point it is important to redraw the lines that look faint(you actually repaint the lines). The icon from an artistic perspective is actually a painted drawing, so the original drawing is very important. However, because egg tempera has some opacity, the lines are also only guidelines. It is hard for me not to cling to the original drawing, because I am still developing my icon drawing skills.

In redrawing the lines, I am always surprised at how enlivened the icon becomes, reenergized or something. Refreshed.

Reflections: I have been able to experience my mother's humanity and "presence" and Christ's presence in her as she is advancing in her Alzheimer's. Somehow, stripped of her personality, I have been better able to actually experience her humanity in a more direct and conscious way. This experience has made me more conscious and reverent of the humanity and presence of God in the people I see everyday. I realized as I took off the layers of paint that had obscured Mary's face in the icon and redrew her face, that I felt more affection for her. I am understanding something more about "presence". As a "T" or "thinker" on the Meyers-Briggs, I am understanding, maybe for the first time, the profundity of the "experience" over just a paradigm shift, or perspective change (which are very important). Mother Teresa always talked about how in the poor and the dying, she experienced Christ. Cognitively, that made sense to me and I strived to "see" people from that perspective, but to experience that reality, has changed me. I believe I have been meeting Christ in a deep and present way in my mother these days. And, how can you leave His presence and not be transformed?

I am on a rough journey, filled with tears and still unexpected pain, but am more and more grateful for my mother- and I realize that for the ordinary human being like me, only love drives you forward. I am grateful to my mother because somehow in the craziness of life and the disappointments in our past relationship, she has inspired that kind of love in me.